


Desire and Guilt

by lorir_writes



Series: To Know You [8]
Category: The Royal Romance (Visual Novel)
Genre: Emotional Hurt, F/M, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-31
Updated: 2019-01-31
Packaged: 2019-10-19 19:18:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,446
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17607368
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lorir_writes/pseuds/lorir_writes
Summary: After confessing his feelings for Jade, the sudden possibility of her being chosen to become Liam’s bride creates a conflict of emotions in Drake’s mind.





	Desire and Guilt

**Author's Note:**

> Based on the (music) prompt: Strange Emotion - Jessy Lanza

Drake sat by himself in the bar station outside. He seemed to be lost in thoughts and Jade walked towards him. “Can we talk?“

He simply gestured for her to sit beside him. "Go ahead. You know I’m always willing to talk to you.” He looked around, searching for a bartender. “What’s a guy gotta do to get a drink around here?”

“Well, lucky for you, I took a turn or two at the bar whenever the occasion called for it.” Jade slid into the bar and picked up the cocktail shaker. She added peach liquor, orange juice, and whiskey into the shaker, dropped some ice cubes and mixed everything together. She poured the drink in two glasses and offers one to him.

He took a sip of the cocktail, uncertain of what he’s in for, and then grins. “I could get used to this.”

Jade picked the other glass and sat back on the bar stool next to Drake. She eyed him dressed up in a gray designer suit and smiled softly. “You clean up good, Drake.”

“Thanks.”

“And here I thought you said you’d only dress up if there was someone you wanted to impress.”

“I guess maybe I found someone worth impressing. If only for tonight.” He ran his hands through his hair. “Hell, Bourbon, my life would be so much easier if I could’ve just hated you.” Jade looked down at her glass, playing with the straw. She knew this was a complicated issue. He confessed he had feelings for her right after Tariq tried to make a pass at her at the Applewood Manor. They haven’t talked about it, but the memory of that night was vivid in both of their minds.

_“What am I doing? I need to go,” Drake stands up and walks to the door._

_“Drake, wait.” Jade holds his hand and he turns to look at her and she wraps her arms around his neck, burying her face on his sculptural bare chest._

_“Bourbon, I shouldn’t…”_

_“Be here? You know I could take care of myself, but that didn’t stop you. You chose to be here.” She looked at him like a magnetic force pulling her to gaze at his deep brown eyes._ _Drake cupped her cheek, wishing he could do more than just caress her face, but he can’t. Yet, he didn’t pull out of her embrace. If she wanted him too, she’ll take charge. He knows she doesn’t wait for guys to make a move. She’s bold enough to do it herself. But she didn’t._

_“Bourbon, I have to go,” he stepped back._

_“Why?”_

_“You don’t need me here.”_

_“But I don’t want to be alone.”_

_“Are you scared? He’s not coming back,” he took a strand of her hair and tucked behind her ear._

_“Will you stay if I say I am?”_

_“Yes.”_

_“Then I’m scared.”_

_“No, you’re not,” he flashed a crooked smile._

_“That doesn’t mean I want to be alone. I could use a friend right now.” Jade pouted a little. _That’s what he was afraid of. He just poured his heart for her, but she just needs a friend.__

_“I can call Hana if you want.”_

_“Drake, can you stay? Please,” she begged._

_The combination of the sweet and citric smell of her perfume was intoxicating, her satin nightgown delicately marking the features of her body. It was torture. She could call anyone else to stay with her right now. And it’d be a real dick move to use her vulnerability to take advantage. But he couldn’t leave. So he took a deep breath and stepped closer._

_“It’s okay, I’m here,” he said, kissing her forehead. They sat on her bed and watched movies until she fell asleep._

He took a large sip of his drink and looked at her intently. “If this is the last time I’m going to be alone with you before you’re an engaged woman, I’d be a damned fool not to kiss you.”

Jade said nothing. She turned to face him, cupped his jaw and kissed him. Drake pulled her closer as their tongues danced in slow motion inside their mouths, connecting them in a way they never thought before. His embrace pressed her body against his and she felt a shiver down her spine. Then he pulled out the embrace, his hands placed on her waist loosely. The kiss was full of tenderness and lust, however, she felt like something was amiss.  _Drake is an amazing man, but he’s not…_  And he pulled away.

“You just thought about him, didn’t you?”

“Huh?”

“You kissed me and I could see you meant it. You wanted me. And then you stopped responding to it. You remembered him.”

“Drake, I…”

“How could I ever thought I’d compete with a guy like him?” He closed his eyes and shook his head.

She cupped his jaw again so he could face her. “Don’t you ever say that. You’re a wonderful man, Drake. Any woman should feel lucky to be loved by you.”

“Yet you don’t.”

“Drake, I do. And I love you. But it’s not the way you want me to.”

“Then why did you kiss me?”

“I was curious,” she bit her lip.

“What?” He narrowed his eyes and she shrugged smiling. “You have some serious explaining to do now, Bourbon.”

“The ladies were talking about what they’re planning to do after the social season and they started to comment about eligible suitors and your name came up.”

“My name?” he stared at her, a little baffled.

“Apparently, many women were drooling over you the whole season and they wish to know how it felt like to be in your arms. And it got me curious.”

“And how does it feel like?”

Jade placed her drink on the bar, her finger tracing the borders of the glass as she tries to find words to describe it. “It’s bittersweet. It was like I could taste desire and guilt. I know I stopped, but you hesitated first. You wanted to kiss me, I could sense that. But your hands… you pulled me closer and then you stopped holding me as if you didn’t wish to be too close. You remembered him too and you felt guilty for kissing me.”

Drake looked down at his glass and sighed. She was right. He remembered him. He remembered everything Liam wished he could do if he was closer to Jade. He remembered his social media stalking on her Instagram and Spotify profiles, his eyes sparkling whenever he set eyes on her, his internet researches about all the things he found out she likes, his nervous paces everytime he heard about a new stupid challenge that could set her aside from the competition, his anger when he heard about Tariq trying to make a pass at her. Drake liked Jade, but he didn’t actually love her. Liam loves her. He confessed it. She just didn’t know about it. “He’s my best friend. He was my only friend for quite a while. I care about you, Bourbon, I do. But I can’t have you. And I know you don’t like me the way you like him.”

Jade took a sip of the drink and smiled ruefully. “If only I just liked him…”

“You mean…” he trailed off.

“I love him. I feel drawn to you, but he’s everything I’ve wished for my entire life.” The truth hit Drake like a punch in the face. She loves him. Although he knew he shouldn’t be so close to her because of Liam, he didn’t realize she reciprocated.

“You think you have liked me if he wasn’t around? If it was just me?”

“There’s no way of knowing it, Drake.” They stood silent for a moment. “Though it would’ve helped if you weren’t such a douche when we first met.” Jade looked at him from the corner of the eye.

“Hehe. I did try to give you a hard time, but you’re tougher than you look.”

“We could have been friends from the beginning,” Jade nudged him.

“If you say so,” Drake shrugged, drinking the last of his cocktail.

“Hey, I’d never between you too. I couldn’t break a childhood friendship apart.”

“I know, Bourbon,” Drake gave her a weak smile.

A small group of noble ladies suddenly walked into the gardens, chatting and laughing. “Looks like the party found us. You’d better head back inside.“

“What about you?”

“I’ll be out here… until it’s time.” Jade stood up, gave a small kiss on his cheek and went back inside. A bitter feeling hit him as she walked away. The desire was gone. All he got left was guilt.


End file.
